he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
