Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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