did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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