Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
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Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
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Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Dear god my vagina.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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