yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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