are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
i dont even know how to be here
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
