You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
third nipple confirmed
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize