Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
