Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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