You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
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