Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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