Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
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