sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
