I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize