fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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