drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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