the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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