you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
