SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
