I love black thongs
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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