found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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