I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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