i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Naked Twister starts at high noon
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize