I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
