i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize