She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Randomize
