There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
She bit a glass in half.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
