new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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