that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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