theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
how does that bad decision feel?
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