is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
We had sex on a dog bed..
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
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