dude i'm inner monologue high
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
