Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Randomize
