Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
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Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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