I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
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