I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
