Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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