We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I did not marry a roomba.
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