we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
