No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Randomize
