but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Randomize
