chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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