uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize