How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize