But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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