Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
