I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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