Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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