How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
