Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
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