yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
